oh no! you killed the original alfalfa!

So I went to Canapalooza tonight at the school. Not in it's entirety because I felt guilty for skipping one guy's house while canvassing the neighbourhood with flyers last week because he was outside with his son, but I went to the second half at the chapel anyways. And I dressed up like Alfalfa. I had the suit jacket, white shirt, pinned-on red bow-tie, hiked up socks, black shorts, and dress shoes, as well as the gelled hair parted in the middle with the white scalp line showing. I tried to get the pointy hair, but I didn't have strong enough gel. Ah well. I still somehow managed to win the prize for best costume. Wierd.

Ah... Little Rascals. How I miss thee.

...

so I got to grandview this morning and sat down expecting something close to a normal worship service, if there is such a thing... and I was all good until out walks the 30 person choir all dressed somewhat the same and moving in something close to unison. I'm not against choirs, I was in one in high school which I miss greatly. It's just when churches go for the show mentality. Then the music was all like the CD, which there's nothing wrong with, except I kinda like when churches make the music their own with their own styles and rhythms. I like cd quality music when I'm at a concert or when I'm listening to the CD, not when I'm in a worship service.

Another issue that I might have is the music played during the offering. It was jazz. I felt like I was in a lounge, not in a house of worship for that time. But perhaps I'm not the one to judge these things.

and your little dog too!

I'm not a huge fan of daylight savings time. It just makes things way more complicated than it should be. Arg.

I think I'm going to Grandview today, though I said that I'd never go again because the worship pastor has used theologically unsound terminology the past two times that I've been there. Darn Bible college, takes the enjoyment out of church sometimes. If only I had a vehicle, or a ride to somewhere that wasn't grandview.

book report anyone?

so I'm reading the NIV Application Commentary on Acts. I have 200 pages left to read before I can even think about starting my 3 page book report due on Tuesday. I'm at the point where I've given up on reading it in it's entirety, and I'm just leaving it to reading the periocopes and the "Contemporary Significance" sections... perhaps that'll cut down 100 pages of reading at least. Hopefully.

the leaves have fallen

So I was wondering when the leaves would fall off the trees, cause it seems like hardly any of them have, even though the ground is a sheet of yellow and orange maple leaves. It looks really cool. All week I was thinking "It's October 2xth. Why haven't the leaves disappeared yet?" Then comes last night. Around 1:30 this morning, I'm woken up to huge cracks of thunder and lightning and pouring rain. I'm just waiting for the fire alarm to go off, because it seems to like going off early morning in the rain... though I'm generalizing from the one time that it's done it. When the storm finally passes so it's just a bit of lightning and rain left, I get back to sleep. Upon waking up this morning, I look outside and there's bare trees out there. So I guess rain and wind help the leaves go falling down. I'm glad that they've fallen in a way. It shows that time continues, and the seasons keep changing, but in a sense, the beauty that was while the leaves were completely yellow and scattered throughout the courtyard and on the trees is coming to a close, and winter is coming soon.

How often do I hold onto a moment because I like the beauty of it? Maybe not even the beauty, but I just hold onto it because of some unknown reason? I think I'm like that one leaf that you see still hanging on for dear life when the snow's falling because it's not ready to let go. I need to let go and let the seasons change. I think I've held onto so many seasons within myself that I have years of leaves clinging to my branches, not allowing the fresh growth to come out when I hit spring. The leaves that are there are dead and withered, and the only thing that's keeping them there is me... all beauty that was once there is gone, but I hold onto the beauty.

I need to let go. I need to regrow.

w00t!

So I've finished my Theology Chapter summary on The Origins of Humans and the purpose of creation. I forget what I wrote, but I know it was a 3 page paraphrase of what was in the 30 pages of the chapter in the text. w00t! Now to do:

• Theology Book Report
• Acts Book Report
• Study for Acts
• Study for Counselling Skills
• Prepare a devo for Monday night care group... I think we're watching Joan of Arcadia and discussin'. I may have put that in another post, I don't know. I'll find out later.

Booyah - Unordered List!

I don't think the counter's accurate, because I'm about half of those visits that it shows, checking to see if anyone has commented. So comment!... your salvation does not depend on it, so I wouldn't worry about it that much. If you feel like commenting, feel free to. Otherwise, be a silent stalker, and I'm perfectly fine with that.

happy reformation

Happy reformation weekend. I hope you're all reading your Zwingli, Calvin, Luther, and Wesley to get caught up for the festivities on Sunday. I'm sure there's more names, but I didn't take History of Christianity, so I don't know much about that topic.

I have a headache right now. I think I'll take a tylenol and then have a nap for a while. I read my Theology chapter this afternoon, and all that's left to do is summarize it. And then comes the book report for Theology (read 100 pages and summarize), book report for Acts (read 300 pages and summarize), study for Acts (intro and 1-8), study for Counselling Skills (everything since the last quiz, which I haven't read anything from the text for yet...), and prepare a devotion for care group on Monday night. I think we're going to watch an episode of Joan of Arcadia and discuss it. I have 54 hours left in the download of it, but that's ok. I'll survive. Speaking of which, only 35 minutes left in the Survivor download. I'm huge into bandwidth today. Wondrous, let me tell you.

Ok, I'm out... TTYL.

i did it

I broke the washing machine. I put my coins in so I could start 'er up this afternoon, and well... the coin mechanism got stuck with my 1.25 stuck inside it. Needless to say, I wasn't pleased. So my clothes are in upper lehman right now washing in their machine. I'll bring them back down here to dry in 6 minutes or less.

I was just in the shower and thinking about the effects that the internet has had on my life, and they're quite numerous, not saying that it's good or bad, but I'm just saying that I could say that part of my teenage years was shaped around the internet and the time I spent on it. Interesting story. I wont get into it now, but I was thinking that it would make a good paper for a class of some sort. Unfortuately, I don't have a class like that this semster, or else I would get writing. Maybe I'm just thinking of ways to procrastinate right now.

4:17 left. I'm waiting anxiously.

4 minutes! Ok. I need to get a life. .. and here I go.

random

anyone see the eclipse last night? It was pretty cool. It's kinda funny how for the first part, the moon gets black, and then in full eclipse, it's yellowish orange. Go figure. I guess it's not happening for 3 more years now. Ah well, no worries.

I had class this morning. It was wonderful fun. Or something like that. The president of the college saved me though. Brought back memories of this summer at church when my salvation was prayed for weekly.

consider yourself counted.

So I added a counter today out of a fear that no one ever reads this. I'm not sure why I did it, seeing as I know my popularity doesn't come from having a lot of people read my thoughts, because I'm ranked 2nd and 1st on two different RA rating scales, but it's out of interest and procrastination moreorless. I have this book report due tomorrow that I've only written about 1/2 of... I'm thrilled, let me tell you. It's going to be a fun night.

mpio doesn't suck as much.

So within 6 hours, I sent an e-mail, got a reply, filled out a form, sent it back, and got another reply from MPIO today. Wow.

Hopefully I can get a new MP3 Player or something like it to replace the one that died on me. I'm still in shock.

Back to homework.

journal me

I'm a part of a webring. It's not the thing that I would expect myself to be a part of, but it's there. Though I kinda feel like a stalker, going through and reading everyone's stories and comments from around the school. I'm not remembering any information after I read it because my short term memory sucks, but it still feels that way when I click next on the blogring in xanga. No, I don't have another journal over a xanga, this is my only one... though I do have a profile over there so I can comment on other people's lives.

Is this another world? Do people actually take what was said in their journals and apply it to their lives? All of this is just words on a screen. Supposedly words can hurt. I think it's true. It's happened to me in the past. I've gotten to dislike talking to people on MSN because it's not personal at all. I wish that I could have them in front of me or beside me. I know it puts more awkwardness into the whole mix because of the whole being right beside them thing, but it's worth it. The feelings that are portrayed by their tone of voice, body language, choice of words, and look in their eyes is all worth it just to know that you are appreciated and respected by another in this world.

When it comes down to it, would I rather have a friendship with people or a friendship with a name. People are better. No offense to those who I only talk to in name, but I get more out of my real person conversations.

If you read this from EBC, come talk to me. I'm here, though in the cool of the ghetto, but I do welcome visitors on a regular basis (for those who get over the fact that they have to do negative work to get down here.)

If you're not nearby, no worries. I'll see you sometime.

gasp!

Finally, I got a response from Digitalway/Mpio regarding my MP3 player. I now have to call the centre in the states, but at least I know they still exist and may care about my problem. I feel so loved now that I have less than 3 months left on my warranty.

bookmarked, part IX

For those who complained, here you go. I hope you enjoy the extra 5 minutes of copying and pasting that I put into this project.

http://www.geocities.com/timio74/bookmark.html

fire!

So it's 2:26 am, and I'm awake. I was asleep, but now I'm awake. at preceisely 2:14 AM, the fire alarm went off, and it's cold and rainy outside. It was a false alarm, but the fact that it went off is stupid. Ah well...

back to bed.

bookmarks galore.

http://www.geocities.com/timio74/bookmark.html

omg lol

I wonder what this world's coming to... my mom's gone into shortform internet lingo...

"C U L8R,

Mom"

What's next? lol. brb. cya. rofl. ttyl.

I'm scared at the possibilities.

dentistry

I saw "The Dentist" last night, and it was a bad movie. Never ever ever ever ever ever watch it, even under fear of death. The only good part was the teenage girl beating up the dentist when he tried to kill her. Other than that, it was pure bad... so bad I was turned away or had my eyes covered for a lot of it.

Ugh.

bookmarked

I was so bored tonight that I was going to make a website devoted to my bookmarks folder in Internet Explorer... Unfortunately, I was about 75% done and I accidentally clicked on a link and it lost all my progress... ah well. Maybe some other time.

some random bookmarks from my folder for the time being.

http://aaotracker.4players.de/buddylist.php
http://www.dnscc.ca
http://www.ebcollege.on.ca
http://www.geocities.com/worstworship
http://www.lincolnroadchapel.ca

busted

Go to www.jesusforguys.com and check out the video under the download section. It's quite good.

a judge, a prosecutor, a defending attorney, and me

So I was reading through 1st John today as I was waiting for classes to be done so we could get setting up for chapel, and the following verse struck me up side the head as I was reading: "My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the father in our defense - Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and no only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world." (1 John 2:1,2)

So here's the picture that came to mind. I'm standing in a court room in the centre of the room, just in front of the fence that you see on most TV shows in the court room. Ahead of me, sits God in His majesty. I just see the bench and behind it all of God's glory. To my left, there's the prosecutor, Satan and he's trying to convince God that I'm guilty for my sins. He's right, I have sinned, and I am guilty. He tells God about the things I've done that I've known were wrong at the time, the things I've done wrong that I don't even realize that I've done wrong, the flaws in my character, and through all of this my pain gets greater as I remember all of these. They hurt, they're sharper than a sword piercing my heart...

Then I look to my right. There stands Jesus. He is lowly, no glamour, no glitz, but something draws me to look at him. He tries to convince God that I don't deserve death. God asks why. Then, Jesus stretches out his arms, gets nailed to the cross, and dies. I break down crying. Why would someone do this for me? How could someone look beyond the filth that so stains me, inside and out? But after this one, solitary act, I am washed. The blood that stained that very cross cleansed me and made me free. Satan screamed. I look up at the bench and beside God, there stands the resurrected Jesus, smiling at me out of love and faithfulness. "You are loved", is all he says. I can't understand it, but it frees me. I believe.

toques and other such things

I realized tonight how much I value my toque. I know it's only a material thing, but my grandma made it years ago, and I grabbed it out of the grab tin at Christmas, probably at least 5-6 years ago. I think I've only had about 4 toques in my life, and this is the one I've placed the most value on. Partially because it's warm, but partially because my grandma doesn't make toques anymore since the blinding of her one eye a few years ago. So it's something that's reminiscent of times that can't be had anymore.

I was upset greatly over the fact that I thought it was gone. For a few minutes, it was on the side of a road about a 15 minute walk from campus and we weren't going to turn around because the driver was in a rush. It was there, in the dark. Taken from me in a rude fashion and let go out the window. It's a petty complaint, but I was upset greatly with a person for the first time in a long time over one small action like this. In the end, it was only a prank, and I was forgiving, but it still was a cruel joke to mess with my emotions like that. I like my toque. I love my grandma for making it for me. ... my eyes are almost tearing up as I write this, but it's true.

I'm grateful for the warmth this toque brings... but even more, I'm grateful for the love that God gives and the warmth that my relationship with Him brings me.

procrastination, makes it happen.

For some reason, I have no motivation at the present to complete a project that's due in less than 48 hours. I have to type out my philosophy of ministry which is 5-7 pages on how I "do" youth ministry. I have the introduction down... kinda like a research paper essay, but much more personal. I hope I don't leave it til tomorrow night and be rushing around like a chicken with my head cut off. I'm already doing that with time and the lack thereof for me. I've been "go" since yesterday before chapel, pretty much with doing sound, having class, RA meeting, class, all rez, paper proposal, sleep, class, sound for chapel, lunch, meeting with Marjorie, and now I'm free and not really looking to do much... though I need to be over in the chapel in a few minutes to do sound again for a ministry team for Thursday's chapel... and then supper, then RA prayer, then I can do homework, maybe. And tomorrow has the joys of Living Stones and SLT meeting taking up 4-5 hours of my day. w00t! I'm not complaining, just writing out my life so I can visualize how busy I am. I can't get into the state of scheduling my life on Outlook because that goes way too indepth... but it might make things easier... but I never work when I want to because my brain shuts down 5 minutes before I sit down.

Ah well... life continues.

what am i doing up so early?

So I'm awake at 12:05 AM and I'm at school. Something's wrong. Perhaps I haven't gone to sleep tonight, and I have class in a little over 8 hours... Oops!

So here I go, with a stomach ache, and a cold bedroom... no working furnace yet. Hopefully soon. At all rez tonight, there was a protest by some people on my floor, and we did a charity case by giving out blankets and soup to all of Lehman. Twas funny. Mission to the Projects.

workload

So I have a few things due this week... only 4 or so. Not bad compared to other years, but one of those things is worth 45% of a mark. Wonderful! I still need to do a Philosophy of Youth Min and find a bunch of things to shove into my appendix (not the body part which I thought was going to need to be removed last week, but that's another non-story).

My floor's really cold right now. I'm doubting the furnace has been turned on yet, so it feels like the next ice age is upon us (not saying there was an ice age or anything, but it's just a figure of speech). And I've had complaints already in the 3 hours that I've been back on campus. Ah well, they'll survive. I think I may go get some straws.

It feels wierd being back. Not that I don't love being here, because I do, but I got used to being at home with more distractions than just a computer. I had TLC and CBC and CTV, etc, etc, etc to keep me distracted, as well as Garrett screaming every now and then, sometimes out of annoyance, other times out of joy as he slowly works his way to free speech in the affairs of his life. Everytime I saw him though, I couldn't stop thinking about Freud's theory of the oral and anal stages... I know it's an implausible theory, but it still came to mind. Stupid psych and culture of youth.

I didn't end up taking the retreat that I wanted to last week to myself, which is kinda disappointing... it's my own fault, seeing as I had all the resources I needed, (Bible and Sunfire), it just didn't come to fruition. That's my new word. Fruition. It doesn't make me feel smarter to use words like that, but it's still something cool. I like expanding my vocabulary. I wish I could find a real test at Scrabble. Someone who knows their dictionary and can give me a challenge. Not now, maybe in a few weeks when the workload's a bit less... but perhaps it will be a bit more.

Speaking of workload, I was looking at the schedule for next semester and it seems like I only have to take 3 classes that are offered and the rest can be Bible Electives, but one of my manditory courses is the same week as SLT training and it's the only time that it's offered while I'm here, but I'm not sure if I can get out of training or if I have to extend my schooling by a semester in order to get all the classes I need. Arg.

Ah well. For some reason I see a lot of contemplativeish journals from people in school around this time. Might be something in the food.

glassificiation and teenaging

So I got my new prescription for my new glasses today, and let me tell you, I thought it was a mistake made by someone who's not me, but the difference was like night and day between that prescription and this one. I was just testing differently that day, and there's no mistake about it. I don't know what the numbers mean, but the first time the one number was a 075 and this week it was a 025. Wierd.

And I just started reading "Canada's Teens: Today, Yesterday, and Tomorrow" by Reginald Bibby, and finished reading the introduction and first chapter, which covered about 40 pages of the book. It was all statistics about the values of today's teenagers. I was a bit bored by them, but it was interesting how the guy wrote 50 pages on statistics... and from what I'm told, there's much more coming in the future of this book. Wierd.

ugh

So I've spent about 8-10 hours working on this calendar for youth min, and I'm still not close to being done. I love how 25 hours will probably end up being 30-40, just like 10 hours ended up being 15-20 for the last project. If only I could just do it on the computer and save myself lots of time by just putting schedule every week and it's done 52 times, rather than me having to write on this huge piece of paper 52 times. Then there's the highlighting, and making sure that all my weeks add up to 35-45 hours. I'm aiming for an average of 40... so I have between 25-30 average right now. Hopefully I can figure out something else to add so it makes up for where I missed.

Then there's the paper that hasn't been started yet. Hopefully I get on that before the weekend... but that's almost here, and I haven't started reading any books that I brought home with me either.

Ugh.

people are dumb.

It's true. People are dumb, more specifically, Christians. We say we follow all of God's commands, like love your enemy, flee from evil, cling to what is good, forgive as the Lord forgave you, etc... but we don't. Where's the grace? Where's the love? Where's the hope? You can't find it by walking into a church. You can't find it by going a Bible college.

Grace is a huge issue where I struggle. God had grace, and he gave it to us. I'm just permanatly reminded of it as I sign my name. That's probably a good thing. Though I'm more likely to look for what's going wrong rather than what's going right. I'm judgemental, methinks. In more ways than one. It sickens me that I still have this urge to give high fives to people standing around me as they raise their hands in worship because I was brought up with charismatics not being right. I know better now, but conditioning says elsewise. I grew up with a judgemental family. And I started judging... but I learned. I still judge. Not as much as in previous days, but it's still there. Someone does something that doesn't compute in my head, and I'm thinking that they're a heathen. Well, maybe not that far, but it's still something that I need to work on. Thankfully God has grace... unfortunately I don't exercise that trait enough... sound familiar?

a song for study

(to the tune of ten little indians)

needs, autonomy initiative
industry, indentity, relationships
legacy, reflection: Erikson's
Psychosocial development

Here's something I wrote for the forums over at Patdryburgh.com.

".... The biggest issue in worship today, worship being defined as any time we come before God and give glory to His name, is the people who take not the subject (being God, which is non-negotiable in a Christian setting), nor the setting (being the building, time, decor), but the style, which is the most negotiable part of worship and throw it out of proportion.

Some people like hymns, others like choruses, good for them, but does that mean that we should make a seperate service for each style? Absolutely not! In Acts, it talks about the believers coming together and breaking bread, not going to one going to a service that sang the Psalms and another that sang the prophesies.

This whole denomination thing and all the arguments and splits that come from the style of worship is a load of garbage. God wants unity, not separation.

This brings the question "is there only one way to worship God?" Absolutely not. The only requirement is that we worship God in spirit and in truth. Can we do it laying flat on our faces? Yes. Can we do it repeating the same line 5 gazillion times until the guitarist passes out from exhaustion? Yes. Can we do it with an organist? Yes. Can we worship while taking communion? Yes. Can we worship while talking a walk through nature? Yes. I heard the line, "worship is a lifestyle", and frankly, I agree with it.

What am I trying to say? I'm not sure, but I know that there is a simple solution to all the problems that are faced within the body of Christ, and all it takes is realizing that God and all He's done for us needs to take the forefront of our worship and anything beyond that doesn't matter."

one final one

Belches

it sounds really loud
coming from the depths of me
silly, gassy boy.

another haiku

E-Mail

checking constantly
there never is any for me
why do I bother?

a haiku

Heartburn

it hurts a whole lot
deep down in my esophagus
burning up my throat

guilty for being loud?

Ok, why, when my floor's loud do I feel an extreme sense of guilt, even though it's before quiet hour? These guys are rarely loud, but then we're mini-golfing in the hall during dorm meeting and the ADSL has to come down from her apartment and tell us to be quiet... Arg. And now I feel really bad because of it... even though it's not necessarily my fault, because we were completely within the rules...

Arg.

so...

a needle pulling thread.

Third Day ROCKED!

We had a blast driving up and back in the two cars we had. w00t!

the period of twenty four hours that follows tomorrow

What a title. It makes no sense as I sit here thinking about it, but anyways....

Tomorrow includes Grandview; Homework; and last, but not least, THIRD DAY AND TOBY MAC at Wonderland. I'm thrilled completely. There's 4/5 RA's from EBC going, and a bunch of other people too. Yay.

triunity

I was actually intrigued today by a textbook. This is not normal because textbooks are supposed to be boring and full of information that you'll never ever use again in your life except for the next exam. That being said, I was reading Theology for the Community of God by Stanley J. Grenz and the chapter about the Trinity was this week's reading. So I started reading, expecting to be bored and confused, but it was an actually interesting chapter. I was shocked!

Then when it came to the paper that we have to write on each chapter in this book, I did over half of it without even looking at the text book because it had interested me that much. This is a strange occurance, I must say. Never before have I been that intrigued by a chapter in a text book that I HAD to read that I would remember that much immediately thereafter reading it.

Wow. This is truly a historical day.

coffee

So we had the coffee house tonight. I'll have to say that going into today, I wasn't sure it would be a big hit. Because everyone goes away on weekends around residence and not many commuters like to participate in events for some reason, I don't understand why... but still.

Anyways, in the end, we ended up putting a tonne of time into it today, as well as a bit of money, but it was for the enjoyment of the crowds. By the time it was finished at 11, there had been about 50ish people through, 10-12 open mic acts, and a 45 minute set by Pat Dryburgh. It was a good time, I think.

Anyways, I'm probably off to bed soon... It's late and I've been up too long today, seeing as I had no classes and got no homework done... though the RA's did get some thoughts down for our first chapel on NOVEMBER 30th. ALL ARE HIGHLY ENCOURAGED TO COME. It's going to be a really good chapel. If you don't go to one EBC chapel this year, this is not the one to miss.